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Dr. Randy Gilchrist

Keeping an Eternal Perspective on Marriage


In our lives as members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, we have often been told that we need to “keep an eternal perspective on things”. But what does “keeping an eternal perspective” mean? It means thinking of and approaching every notable circumstance/decision in this life with a consideration of how our approach to it will matter one way or the other both now and in the next life. In the eternities. After the days of our mortal existence have ended. The idea and hope is that when we make decisions with a constant awareness of how such choices will affect ourselves and others in the big, eternal picture, we are far more likely to make the best decision possible.


One of the biggest decisions we can make in this life involves who we choose to marry, where, and when. In fact, a famous quote from Elder Bruce R. McConkie states the following: “The most important things that any member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints ever does in this world are: 1. To marry the right person, in the right place, by the right authority; and 2. To keep the covenant made in connection with this holy and perfect order of matrimony—thus assuring the obedient persons of an inheritance of exaltation in the celestial kingdom.” (Bruce R. McConkie, Mormon Doctrine [Salt Lake City: Bookcraft, 1966], p. 118.)” In short, choices involving marriage is very important. So, to make such an important decision with an eternal perspective is a very wise approach.


Taking An Eternal Perspective when Considering a Potential Spouse:


1) What is their relationship with God like? What is their testimony like? Do they freely and enthusiastically attend church, pray, and read scriptures? Do they freely and regularly share their testimony? What is their attitude and approach to the words of the modern prophets? Do you actually feel the Spirit when you talk to them and are around them? Hopefully a potential spouse is decently strong in all of these areas. However, it is important that a potential spouse is not too much stronger than you spiritually or there will be a mismatch, which will likely lead to future frustrations, arguments, and resentments. Therefore, if you desire to be with a spiritually strong individual—a positive, healthy goal—it is important to first get yourself stronger spiritually in these ways to help you best match up well with such an individual. Sometimes this is called “being equally yoked” spiritually.


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